yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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