This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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