Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Randomize
