oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize