whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
