i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
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