A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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