Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.

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  (847): Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk. http://tfl.nu/mos7
  Replies (17) Good night (8216) Bad night (764)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  i got excepted to unl lol

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  You mean "accepted".

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  (402): i got excepted to unl lol (402): You mean "accepted". http://tfl.nu/3nr7
  Replies (76) Good night (1776) Bad night (6215)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I love boston

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  (781): The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH (781): I love boston http://tfl.nu/jz0y
  Replies (37) Good night (8666) Bad night (1164)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time

  (1-309): View more from Illinois

  I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating

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  (309): I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time (1-309): I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating http://tfl.nu/74eg
  Replies (21) Good night (5037) Bad night (1338)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever

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  (205): btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever http://tfl.nu/nic9
  Replies (11) Good night (2438) Bad night (1769)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.

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  (713): He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that. http://tfl.nu/cec8
  Replies (6) Good night (752) Bad night (1543)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.

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  (270): I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms. http://tfl.nu/29v1
  Replies (18) Good night (1225) Bad night (2766)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.

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  (207): Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck. http://tfl.nu/rwsp
  Replies (6) Good night (1097) Bad night (1010)
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  (631): View more from New York

  I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.

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  (631): I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth. http://tfl.nu/otea
  Replies (9) Good night (2407) Bad night (682)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.

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  (847): Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite. http://tfl.nu/nf89
  Replies (3) Good night (1027) Bad night (547)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday

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  (316): Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday http://tfl.nu/stim
  Replies (2) Good night (591) Bad night (383)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x

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  (+44): No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x http://tfl.nu/ydw7
  Replies (2) Good night (612) Bad night (460)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"

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  (413): weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories" http://tfl.nu/0nvt
  Replies (6) Good night (1253) Bad night (412)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.

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  (785): Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want. http://tfl.nu/2jiy
  Replies (3) Good night (927) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...

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  (270): What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me... http://tfl.nu/bzfn
  Replies (4) Good night (727) Bad night (388)

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