You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
