Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
do nipples grow back?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
