I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
