You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
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