Can i not drive my cunt home
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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