How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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