I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
