I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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