Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
