Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
