So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize
