Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
