God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Can I color on your dick again?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
