Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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