found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
