I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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