its not stalking. its research.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
