you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Randomize
