so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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