I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
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