His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
