you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
