dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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