that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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