He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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