I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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