Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
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