# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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