And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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