How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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