Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
