11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Randomize