Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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