does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
