i jhust puked up my retainher.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
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