Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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