in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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