oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
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I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
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You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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