The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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