erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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