seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
