In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
