you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
